For many, intercultural communication can appear very complex at first instance. However, you should be reassured, because it is not as complicated as it seems. With a little goodwill and some small guiding principles to respect, anyone can get there!
The first thing to accept and understand is that all individuals on this planet, even you and I, we all are carriers of cultures and we are all unique. I.e. because of the environment where we grew up in, our memberships of various groups, our education, our experiences as well as the multitude of influences that forged us, our identity was built and it evolves unceasingly, even still today.
One very often associates cultural difference with the difference of country of origin, ethnic group or religion, but actually, it can also refer to the differences in relation to the social background, age, region, micro-culture. When it is a question of culture, the analogy of the iceberg is often used. Perhaps you did already hear someone speak about it?
An iceberg, although it appears huge seen above the water, is in fact much larger, because an immense part of it is under water. On the level of culture, it is the same. We think that we see the complete iceberg, but in fact, the most important part of it is hidden under water. What we see: gestures, actions, a way of life, the non-verbal, certain habits, laws, institutions, the spoken language, the way of dressing oneself, etc… What we do not see: the history (of the person, of his/her family, of his ethnic group, his country, etc…), the values, beliefs, the way of thinking, standards, the emotive part related to the membership, etc…
It is important to stop for a while and to reflect on what we are as persons because that will much influence the way of interacting with the others. It is the first stage of intercultural communication.
We all know that communication implies a transmitter, a receiver and a message to be transmitted. It often happens that the message is not received exactly as the transmitter would like because there are filters: value judgments, misunderstandings or incomprehension. These filters often become more numerous when we know little about the other and when he comes from a very different environment? Fortunately, there are some small tricks which one can apply to support the communication with everyone and particularly with the newcomers.
1° Taking a few moments to think about what I am, from where I come, why I think as I think, why I have such or such values, which are my typical reactions and why? Pay attention to the judgements which one can have a tendency to develop quickly vis-à-vis certain behaviours or people while generalizing.
2° If French is not the mother tongue of the person, speak a bit more slowly by using simple words and by avoiding to use purely Québécois expressions. For instance, avoid expressions such as: asteure, pantoute, chu (for I am), char, etc…
3° Use concrete examples without too many abstract explanations.
4° Listen attentively and validate information in case of doubt. Asking questions can clarify certain miscomprehensions. It is even possible to ask the other to tell us in his/her words what he understood to make sure that it is what one wanted to say.
5° Without necessarily changing one’s way of approaching people, knowing that certain cultures privilege an indirect communication and that they do not all have the habit to go straight to the point. It is also possible on the one side, like on the other, that the intonation of the voice or the non-verbal has a positive or negative impact on the person.
6° Try to understand the gestures and the reactions of the other (the why, his point of view) while trying to put yourself in his skin. Ask questions if need be.
7° Maintain an attitude of being open to difference, accept that each person is unique and avoid granting to one’s own culture a statute of superiority and treating the cultures on a hierarchical basis.
8° Put your bets on the common points between you! There are a lot more of these than you may possibly think. That will reinforce the bonds in a positive way and it will facilitate the exchanges. For instance: Do you both have children? Do you like to travel? Do you know the country of the other one? Do you practise a sport or an activity of joint leisure such as soccer, reading, outdoor activities, music, etc…
In a general way, it is completely correct to express the fact that one does not know the culture of the other well. To learn how to greet in the language of the other is usually very pleasant to hear, for both sides.